Reintroducing Old-School Etiquette: Why Our Young Ladies Need to Learn the Basics Again

In today's fast-paced, digital world, it feels like so many things that once shaped us—values, traditions, and old-school etiquette—have taken a backseat. And when it comes to raising young women, the loss of these timeless lessons is a trend we can’t afford to ignore. I’m talking about the simple yet powerful practices that once taught us respect, poise, and the importance of self-awareness.

I grew up learning these core principles from the women in my life—my mother, grandmothers, aunts, teachers, coaches, and mentors. These women were the pillars that instilled in me the value of kindness, respect for others, and an understanding of how to present myself with confidence. They showed me that a firm handshake, a polite thank you, and knowing how to communicate gracefully were more than just formalities—they were symbols of strength, confidence, and leadership.

But somehow, somewhere along the way, these lessons began to fade. The art of etiquette—basic manners, proper communication, self-respect—seemed to be overshadowed by the rush to be "cool," "independent," and "rebellious." While we should absolutely celebrate the spirit of individuality and progress, it’s important to acknowledge that somewhere, old-school etiquette got lost in translation.

What happened?

It’s hard to pinpoint exactly when it all started to change. Maybe it was the shift towards more casual, laid-back approaches in society, or the rise of social media where quick interactions and online personas became the focus. But regardless of the reasons, what’s undeniable is the impact it’s having on our young ladies today. Without these basic skills and values, we’re at risk of losing the foundation upon which true leadership and self-confidence are built.

It’s time for a reawakening.

We need to go back to the basics and teach our young women the importance of etiquette—starting with the small things that have a lasting impact on their futures. Simple practices like:

1. Good Communication Skills: Whether in person or over a screen, knowing how to speak and listen with respect is vital. We need to teach young women how to communicate effectively, whether they're addressing peers, adults, or colleagues.

2. Politeness and Respect: Saying "please" and "thank you," offering a firm handshake, and maintaining eye contact are small gestures that make a big difference. These actions show a level of self-respect and an awareness of how to interact with the world.

3. Poise and Presence: Carrying yourself with dignity and confidence is something that can be learned and nurtured. Knowing how to present yourself, dress appropriately for different occasions, and walk into a room with poise can significantly affect how others perceive you and, more importantly, how you perceive yourself.

4. Empathy and Compassion: One of the strongest aspects of etiquette is understanding how to make others feel respected and valued. Teaching our young ladies to be considerate and thoughtful towards others builds strong character and leadership.

5. Accountability and Responsibility: Being accountable for one’s actions, showing up on time, and owning mistakes—these are qualities that every strong leader possesses. They may seem like old-fashioned values, but they are timeless and essential for personal growth.

We’ve lost some of this knowledge along the way, but it’s not too late to bring it back. There’s no reason why we can’t equip today’s young women with the tools to succeed in both life and leadership, while helping them rediscover the benefits of these practices.

We owe it to our daughters, nieces, students, and mentees to ensure they understand that true confidence doesn’t just come from outward appearance or social media following—it comes from self-respect, gratitude, and treating others with kindness. When we reintroduce these simple yet powerful lessons, we’re giving them the foundation they need to confidently navigate the world as the strong, capable leaders they are destined to be.

So, let’s go back to the basics. Let’s teach our young ladies the importance of etiquette—because, in the end, the simple things we once took for granted are often the ones that make the greatest impact on their future success.